My brain’s writing cheques that my body can’t pay!

The lesson of the day is that just because I can think it, it doesn’t actually mean that I can actually do it. However, any progress is progress – however, small!

I was accepted for the lung rehabilitation program yesterday which was a great relief. While I know it will be hard, two days a week I will have a respiratory nurse and a kinesiologist guide me through exercise to regain better use of my lungs and body. Thankfully, they have taken my allergies, and scent sensitivities, into account and have come up with a plan to help me manage being around other people and to deal with reactions as needed.

I’m hopeful that the 10 week program will really help me to lose the weight that I gained from the steroids as well!

So today, in my enthusiasm, I thought that I’d have a go at the first step in the program; walking. Completely ignoring the fact that the whole point of the program is that it is supervised to keep me safe!

I decided to load the dogs up and drive to a local nature reserve and go for a walk. Both dogs were delighted when I got out their ‘play’ collars and leashes and loaded them in the car. (Because Kai is a working dog he wears specific equipment for working that is different to when we’re just going for a walk.)

We set off for the nature reserve but on the way I realised that the parking area near it would be packed and that there would be lots of people as Bon Soo started this weekend. Far too many people and therefore too high a risk of scent for me.

Instead of just coming home as I was considering, I decided to see if the City was clearing the boardwalk for walking. Much to my delight they are. So I parked at the end of the Mall car park away from pretty much everybody else and went for a walk on the boardwalk.

Unfortunately it quickly became apparent that while I might be feeling a lot better emotionally, my body still has a lot of catching up to do. So we didn’t walk very far at all.

Bu we did walk!! We did get out of the house and get some fresh air and enjoy the sunshine as it’s a sunny 0C here today!

Thankfully I realised that my brain was writing a cheque that my body wasn’t going to be able to pay and turned back before it became an embarrassing situation. I’m not sure that I’d have enjoyed calling/texting for paramedics simply because I had tried to walk too far!

Sadly, this time a year ago the walk that I did today would have just been half of the first section of a much. much longer walk. Walking is one of the few forms of exercises that I have always been able to do and sometimes even enjoy. For some reason, I don’t ever get the adrenaline ‘high’ from exercise that others do so I always have to find a way to induce my mind to encourage my body to exercise.

Anyway, today I did it. I wanted to go for a walk and I did.

So rather than be concerned with the fact that I couldn’t walk very far at all before being completely out of breath, despite taking all my medications preventatively as required, I’m going to celebrate the fact that I got out and walked at all!

So if you’re like me and exercise is a struggle… do what you can, even if it’s not much. Any exercise is better than none!

As for Kai, Molly and me? We’re now off for a nap!

Hiatus is over…. I’m back again…

I apologise for the long gap between posts this month. I ended up taking a three week hiatus while I was hospitalised. I’m now home and doing well.

The time in hospital allowed my doctors to adjust my medications and helped me accept both the limitations of my allergies and RADS, as well as to be less negative about the possibilities for disability accommodation. While I had many asthma attacks and was constantly having allergic skin reactions it was the longest that I have been away from home without having anaphylaxis in many months.

My heartfelt thanks to all the staff and patients who made that possible by accommodating my allergies and environmental sensitivities (RADS).

Also, my thanks to my friend who took care of Molly for me. As you can see, she had a great time usurping her dogs from their beds.

Kai was with me in the hospital so I don’t have any pictures of him during the last few weeks. However, he was a superstar!! He dealt with the overwhelming volumes of people and huge variety of noises and just kept on working day in and day out. It was hard to get him some real down-time while I was there so he’s relaxing at home now. Well deserved!

In this picture he and Molly are back in their favourite spots. Kai is curled up on my feet and Molly is next to him and all three of us are sharing my couch!

It’s good to be home!

Sleep… The irony of an insomniac having a sleep study!

Last night, in the latest effort to find out the cause of my breathing problems, I had a sleep study at the Superior Sleep Centre.

A sleep study is designed to help physicians diagnose conditions such as:

In my case, we’re obviously more concerned with looking for a breathing-related sleep disorder which can range from chronic or habitual snoring to upper airway resistance syndrome (UARS) to frank obstructive sleep apnea (OSA) or, in some cases, obesity hypoventilation syndrome (OHS).

However, as a life-long insomniac who suffers from night terrors from  C-PTSD the thought of a sleep study was rather funny. Added to which, since I’ve had my current breathing issues I haven’t been able to sleep anywhere but in a recliner, as I start coughing as soon as I try lying down.

Anyway, last night was the night. Kai and I packed up and headed to the centre for 8pm. We were one of the first to arrive so were soon shown to our room and asked to complete a number of forms and questionnaires before changing into PJs (shorts and a T-shirt in my case as I can’t stand anything around my legs in my sleep).

Then they hooked me up. 45 minutes later I looked even more like an alien than I did before. As you can see from the educational image below, it’s a lot of leads and wires. After a few reminders, Kai was phenomenal about leaving them alone. Though he delighted in being allowed to help take them off this morning!


We then rested and read for an hour or so while the technician wired up other patients, then we did a potty break and she connected this lot up to the monitoring equipment.

We ran through some exercises to check everything was working properly and settled down for the night.

With the help of some extra pillows, I was able to get in a reasonably comfortable position. Kai had no such issues. He just curled up around my arm and relaxed.

Now, unfortunately, they had placed me in the room next to the shared washroom so Kai did take a while to fully settle and stop alerting to somebody being at the door but he didn’t take long.

My sleep was probably actually a little better in the centre than at home in that while it took me hours to get to sleep, once I got to sleep I think I woke up less and I certainly slept a little later than usual. However, we were still the first ones up and released this morning.


It will take about 6-8 weeks for all the results to be scored and the information provided back to my specialist and family doctor. Hopefully, there will be an answer to my breathing difficulties.

Kai and I got home just before 6am this morning when Molly was delighted to see us. Everybody went potty and had breakfast and we all went back to bed! Well (to the reclining couch) where ironically I actually managed to sleep for another hour to so!

Now if only I could sleep, and wake up feeling rested, things would be really improving!Sleep-and-Baby-Quotes-5